College/When vanity becomes judgmentalism

So this weekend the youth group that I practice my faith with went up to DuBose conference center for our annual spring retreat called "ekklesia", this year the topic was death, and how we in America can go about appropriating it. The weekend went really well, we had a good time, there was just sooooo much information that was spoken that it would have been nearly impossible to take it all in. On Saturday after noon while we were sitting in a Mexican restaurant out in Winchester, Tn, mi madre calls to tell me that I had just gotten a letter from Loyola University in Chicago (#1 school), she had not opened it but she said the letter said "congratulations" on the outside. I tell her that I'll call her later that afternoon so that she can read what it says. Later on I call her and she begins to read "Dear Jeffrey... Congratulations we would like to extend an invitation...you have been awarded scholarship..." so on and so forth; all the important things were included. So, my friends, as of Saturday at about 4 o'clock I am officially in college. One of the cool parts was that I got to share it directly with a couple of my really good friends who were up there with us. The process, of course, is not over, I gotta figure out whether it's even possible for me to go to this school, because the cost is astronomical, but I'll be damned if something like impossible odds will keep me from feeling this incredible feeling of relief – at least for a couple days.

I have been noticing recently that I do a fair amount of deciding what I think of people by the way they look. Not that the way someone looks doesn't say something about who they are, because it effects them very directly and can be the leading cause of one or multiple of their personality traits, however that's no accuse to size someone up based on, well, their size. I think it especially has to do with the way they carry themselves, cause let's be honest, any body(double meaning implied) can be attractive if the person carries themselves well. Maybe it's all about posture....? A posture of confidence usually stems from some sense of confidence and most people who are over weight struggle to find that confidence and therefore posture themselves in an unconfident way, therefore showing that they don't have much confidence (because they don't). It's cyclical, too. Someone who has an overconfident gets complimented a lot, usually, and then they stay overconfident. I don't really know where I'm going with this, but just know this, I can be very shallow when it comes to the way you hold yourself – which is really funny cause I have terrible posture... like all the time.

peace.